Departure

I write this at 11PM, on the night before my third departure for Taiwan.

I am excited, so excited that I doubt I will sleep, although the glass of Chianti might help on that front. (I know, "be not drunk", and I have yet to be, no worries there.)

So rarely do I feel that I can anticipate something fully, up until the moment it happens. Typically this ends in the anticipated thing managing to not occur. I have foolishly done this in the past with things that I had no surety of, and met with great discouragement, but last year as I remained skeptical up until our plane left Osaka for Taipei (meaning that we would either land in Taiwan or crash) I was forced to admit that some things can be fully savored up until the moment that they do indeed occur. This can only happen when God permits it. I have no control over whether this trip happens or not now; it is in His hands. I will trust that He can bring me to Taiwan once again if He chooses.

Taiwan felt inexplicably like home after the first trip. The second trip felt very much like coming home again, and it remains to be seen what the third trip will feel like. I sometimes catch myself using terms like "coming to Taiwan" rather than "going to", as if I am already there in a sense, and am only returning to myself. We shall see. At present, as far as my long term stay is concerned, I have dragged my feet on my application, but finally filled it out and gotten some references. I had hoped to send it before I left, but I have reaped the rewards of my procrastination, and that will not be the case. It is just, however, the fault is my own and I cannot complain. I do know that I will get there this fall at some point, Lord Willing.

Speaking of moving in that direction, I have informed my employers of my decision to quit this fall. They took it well, or at least appeared to, and wished me luck in my endeavors. I feel relieved; the last couple of months at work have felt like a sort of hypocrisy, with me knowing that I will not be there too much longer, but my employers considering me an investment for the future. I am sorry that their investment has not profited them as they expected, but I think my time there has been well-spent, and have no regrets on that front.
It's time to move on, to a wider world.

The world that awaits me.

May He deliver us there safely, and bless our efforts for His glory.