Dynamic Unequivalency

It is my determination to not be a Bible translation/adaptation snob.
There are uses for most versions of the Bible, from simply-worded adaptations for new believers who are not familiar with common Christian terminology, to heavily annotated study Bibles designed to be used in conjunction with multi-volume concordances. (This grace does not extend to gender-neutralized adaptations; for those who wish to neutralize gender in violation of both Biblical, natural, and grammatical principles, I believe Paul had some choice words in Galatians 5 which might apply rather well.)

However, I admit that when possible, I prefer as little dynamic equivalency as possible.
I realize that some things in ancient Hebrew simply have no English equivalent, and thus must be taken over as a thought and not word-for-word, but in the NIV, for example, we have thought-for-thought taken so far that the original meaning can become obscured.

In a study of John I led a few years ago, we often came across places where Jesus says or does things that seem paradoxial. Not being eastern in our philosophy, we feel that these apparent paradoxes should be resolved, and that's where the trouble starts. When the NIV translators, with good and God-glorifying intentions I have absolutely no doubt, decided to smooth over a few passages by adding or changing a word here or there, they removed some of the "punch" of Jesus' words, and in a few cases nearly obscured the original meaning altogether.

One example we ran across was Jesus' first miracle, at the wedding in Cana.
When Mary asks Jesus to help, Jesus' response, in the NIV, is as follows:

"Dear woman, why do you involve me?" Jesus replied, "My time has not yet come."

Contrast this to His more literal reply in the ESV:

And Jesus said to her, "Woman, what does this have to do with me? My hour has not yet come."

The "Dear" is an addition. There is no "Dear" in Hebrew.

At this point, some are quick to rush in.
"But obviously Jesus wouldn't have been rude to His mother, so He must have meant it in a endearing way." Or more subtly, "'Woman' was considered a term of endearment in Hebrew culture at the time, so adding 'Dear' is just clarifying that for modern readers."

That may be so. But the fact remains that Jesus said "Woman".
If you want to know why He said it that way, go do some research. You might learn some things you wouldn't have otherwise. But don't change the Bible on the off-chance that some people might be confused about Jesus' philial piety, please.

The root of the issue is that we want Jesus to conform to our standards of morality.
"Oh, He wouldn't have done/said/meant that, so let's clarify it by adding something"

Jesus IS morality. He and the Father are One, and the Father is the Great I Am.
And all of creation has been placed specifically under His dominion. All laws that are true and binding have their source in Him.

We have no call to go trying to conform Him to our understanding of morality and right behavior.
The duty of any Bible translator is to as accurately as humanly possible recreate exactly what Christ said and did. If He did something that was apparently paradoxical, perhaps He intended it to be that way?

In the before-mentioned John study, we uncovered much valuable information by looking at these apparent paradoxes. What we found is that every time there is what appears to be a paradox, Jesus is being consistent, and we are being inconsistent. We were forced to change our thinking as a result, and learned a great deal.

Had we only had a dynamic equivalency text for study purposes, that learning would have been impossible, as the confusing portions would have all been glossed over, leaving us with something true, but less extensive, and certainly less mind-renewing.

As for me, I like my Bible with the crusts still on.
Don't give me the rounded-off edges of truth, please, it's demeaning to God and all of us to say that He didn't know what He was doing when He said that, or that we are not intelligent enough to figure it out.

-Joseph

PS: Did I mention I was excited that I'll be learning to read the Bible in its original languages soon? Greek and Hebrew, here I come...

Mind Games

Working hard these past couple weeks. What follows is merely an attempt to achieve catharsis through writing, so I apologize for what will sound very much like whining, and very unlike anything useful or edifying.

I seem to have a defect in my character, which is that while I am often very effective at tasks I have set my mind to, every so often I find myself nearly incapable of setting my mind to something, which makes it very difficult for me to accomplish.

The other side of this is that to do something well, I need to set my mind to it.

This means setting aside a certain amount of mental overhead, which varies depending on how natural the task is to me. Some things I can fully invest in, with enjoyment and little or no mental strain. Other things can require a constant effort to maintain focus, which in turn reduces mental energy available for other tasks.

My task of late has been my temporary job working out on the yard at the local branch of a company for which my father manages several offices.

The shift is 7AM to 3:30PM, if I don't go over, (we often do, to reach a good stopping point for the day, which means I have flex hours in case I can't make a full day at some point, due to illness or bad weather) which means I have to wake up at 5 or 5:30 every morning, and have 8 hours of manual labor (with 30min for lunch) every day, Monday to Friday.

That should be pretty straightforward, and it is, exhaustingly so.
Having to more or less forcibly shut off my brain for most of the day requires constant effort, as its natural state is to be spinning wildly. And then at the end of the day, I find waking it back up is difficult. My mind, consistently repressed, wishes to remain adapted to the new routine.

The physical side is reasonably laborious, but nothing like the strain of having to constantly pay attention to a mostly unchanging task. The best analogy I can think of is being required to watch water boil, for 8 hours a day, instantly removing the pot at precisely the boiling point and replacing it with a fresh one. Except that the pots boil at random speeds, requiring constant attention.

An additional difficulty is the very nature of the task to which I have been assigned.
While I won't go into excessive detail, it is essentially equivalent to being told to dig a hole and fill it in, or move a pile of dirt from here to there, then back.
My goal when starting any task is to finish it, and if possible, finish it in such a way that it never needs to be tackled again, leaving future energies for other tasks.
Now I find myself working almost for work's sake. If not for the purpose for which I am saving money, it would indeed be labor for labor's sake, considering my degree would allow me to work in a different field entirely, for a much higher hourly rate.

But I have already forsaken the path of personal prosperity, and each day I stay away from my career path is a little of my bridge burnt behind me.
I cannot fully feel the impact of this yet, I know. I'm young, healthy, and have no family or other dependents that would feel the stress of financial shortfalls. Later in life, if God permits me more decades, I will begin to fully realize the implications of my decisions now.
I have truly trusted God now, but I will have no choice but to fully trust Him then, when the funds run short and I'm not as flexible as I am now.

But to say it will be worth it is either to greatly understate, or to misunderstand the scenario entirely. Life is wasted when it is not spent in pursuit of God's plan and for His glory.
For a believer, this is what life is. Not to give God a substantial piece of 'your' time, but to surrender your whole life, all areas, all resources, all time, to the one to whom you owe your soul.
My life is a small thing to give the One who gave it to me, then died to give it anew, but it is all I have to give, and He knows that it is His.

So when I find myself writhing in the mental imprisonment of mostly mindless drudgery, I have to kick start myself a little. This is not for me, and it's not about me either. God who gave me my brain will keep it active enough to serve Him, and that is enough. Or should be. I have come so far, but only reached the top of the first foothill. Looking back, I can see myriads of people who will sadly never know the rewards of making it this far, but looking ahead, I see the mountain ranges yet to be crossed. What joys, pains, and glories lie in those sunny peaks and dark ravines, God knows. I do not. But I am impatient to be among them. In His time, in His time.

-Joseph

A Prevenient Witness

Just a short thought today.

The faith crises in my life, when they occur (seemingly less and less often, thanks to Him), are rarely about a specific attribute of God, or about Jesus' death or resurrection.

Instead I find myself tempted to doubtfully wonder, if I will wake up one day and realize that the entire Theistic viewpoint was a mental construct.

As an engineer by trade, living in a secular humanist society, that seems to be the most forceful attack on faith for me. It's not a question of the specifics; given the existence of God as He has declared Himself to be in His Word, the rest all follows naturally, and can be to some extent logically inferred. There is then merely the issue of living as we have been called to live, day by day.

In Taiwan, I was hit pretty hard on this front, living among literally millions of people for whom the pressing issue of Christ's identity and the nature of God (in the Biblical sense of GOD) was neither something to viciously attack or gratefully accept, but simply irrelevant.

Of course, I know my Redeemer, and even if I had sinfully accepted a lie for a time, He would have called me back. As it was, through the crucible of that time, my identity in Christ was established so firmly for me, that I doubt I will ever be hit so hard from that angle again.
My existence, as I see it, is bound up in this: that I am a child of God.

Take God away from my world view, and there is simply nothing left. He is the source and center of all that is, and I am incapable of viewing the world otherwise.

One thing that He has consistently used to strengthen my faith is the beauty of His creation.
It's hard for me to put my thoughts on it into words, but this world is very... contrived. It's not the kind of place that just happens, it's a very carefully constructed home for us.

Roaming through space, through regions devoid of life far too immense to imagine or even express metaphorically, we suddenly come to a planet perfectly located, angled, and situated for sustaining life. And not just life, but abundant, beautiful life, in a self-sustaining system of unbelievable intricacy and complexity.

Intelligent Design proponents are fond of using the "Watchmaker Theory" to express this thought, but to me, it's not so much like finding a wrist watch in the desert, as, say, New York City.

To imagine that even the basic laws of physics emerged from nothingness is totally absurd.
How can a law exist without a law-giver? We know of no example of order ever coming from disorder. Outside energy must be imposed on the system in order to impose order.

Even atheist physicists, while denying a personal God, must admit that the universe had an initiator of some kind. (the "uncaused cause") Of course, they are unwilling to pursue this further, else their atheism must be short-lived.

But when we look at the world, we do not see a cold, abstract force driving physics, but a personal, artistic touch. Every majestic picture the Hubble sends back is God leaving man "without excuse".

Every time I look out a window, my faith in God is strengthened. A tree alone is a testament to His glory, not to mention a sunrise. And yet people live under this unbelievable, ever-changing visual display we call "the sky", and never seem to notice it, or wonder why it's a thing we have.
To borrow a concept from Lewis, the sky is something you couldn't have imagined.

If the Mona Lisa suddenly appeared on your living room wall, you would no doubt be surprised.
And you would probably not accept this situation as normal, even if it continued for weeks.

That is how I feel about nature. I don't take it for granted, I am continually astonished by it. It, and so many other things. I walk around taking everything in, and wondering why I seem to be the only one surprised to find it there.

Perhaps this is why I sometimes feel as though there is some fundamental difference between myself and almost everyone I know, to the point that there have been times in my life where I felt I was less like a human and more like something sent in from the outside to observe.
Most people seem to have accepted the world they have found themselves in, as if it couldn't have been different. It could have. It could have been drastically different. The miracle is that it is exactly as it is, and I live in continual amazement of that fact.

God was under no requirements to make the world as beautiful as it is. It could have been a drab, flat, uninspiring place, as some small pockets of it are, and we would hardly be in a position to complain about that. But He made mountains, oceans, canyons, volcanoes, coral reefs, rain forests, deserts, billions of creatures in staggering complexity, each one a work of art, together composing the life on this perfectly oriented ball of rock that orbits the raging nuclear explosion in space we call the sun, because THAT IS THE KIND OF GOD HE IS.

-Joseph

Thinking out loud

So I will apologize in advance for doing something that I generally dislike reading on other people's blogs, which is referencing things that are going on in life without clarification. It generally leaves the odd feeling that the thoughts are important enough to voice publicly, and yet too private to actually share. (so then, better to keep them to one's self?)

But somehow, as one may infer from the massive outpouring of the innermost thoughts of so many individuals onto the web for anyone in the world to see, we find solace in getting things out when we know people will see it, yet hesitate to fully divulge.

So, Mea Maxima Culpa, I fear I may indulge in this practice today as well.

First, however, I note that my life is changing. Life tends to alternate between periods of continuation and change, I've found. I submit that resisting those periods of change is what leads to a lack of personal growth in many people, yet perhaps some can be forgiven for wishing to stay in their current state.

I was in Taiwan for a year. The length of time tends to pale now in comparison with the significance of the time. A year is not long, and yet so many things can happen in that time.
I could have stayed there, for an indefinite period of time. I would have been very happy.
There are various motivations for this, some altruistic, some godly, and some merely selfish. One personal inclination is to bury myself in the endless, trackless wonder that is the earth, ceaselessly cataloging its wonders, people, realms, and climes. There is enough to be seen and experienced here for many, many lifetimes, let alone however long is allotted to the remainder of mine. I comfort myself in that I will have eternity to explore the new earth, and that despite the common misconceptions of eternity, it will be even much more interesting than this one.

But I did not stay, of course, I returned. There were many good and practical reasons why this should be so, and I do not regret leaving except in a temporary and irresponsible sense.

Now I am taking practical steps to return, but really, can you ever return?
I am going back to Taiwan only in the sense that Taiwan is a geographical location to which I have previously ventured and will (Lord Willing) subsequently again visit.

Save perhaps a short visit in the summer, devoted to work, it will be a few years before I can count on living there again. The people I knew will have experienced those years independently, and some things will have changed. The ever-dynamic cities will have changed, the political landscape will certainly have changed. I will have changed.

So in a sense, one can never "go back". One can only move forward.
And so I do. But with a sense of loss that I feel more keenly every year, it seems.
Life is passing by, and we cannot bring it back. The only One who has the power to do so has placed us in the sort of universe in which this does not occur.
Older people generally mark this passing more anxiously than younger people, as the years seem to fly faster and faster. And yet, they do not. Time passes at exactly the same rate for a 12 years old as it does for a 92 year old. What feels so different about it?

I would submit that most 12 year olds are too busy living life to mark its passing, while for a 92 year old, nearly all of life has already been lived. A good lesson for us all, perhaps, though reflections on life's brevity are certainly healthy if handled in the appropriate manner. I once read the statement that "your senior year of highschool is the best year of your life".
What a depressing thought! Imagine that your entire life from 17ish onwards is merely coasting towards the inevitable grave, with nothing better to look forward to than that which has already come.

But yes. Changes. 3 years ago, I lived in Huntsville. I had my own apartment (shared, but equally payed for), a promising career, a car which I payed cash for, and enough money that, had I cared to spend it, I could have bought a little sailboat, or put money down on a small house.
I also had many friends, a stable environment, no debt, and in short was beginning life after college about as well as anyone does.

Now, I live at home again. My job lies in the past, though thankfully my car still serves me, and the savings that seemed bound to increase every year have parked as they are, with that fateful title of "life" appended as a prefix. Thankfully, still no debt, but now my financial obligations for seminary are such that without help of my family in Christ, debt would be all but inevitable.

But God is great. Could I exchange the past two years for thrice the income I would have made during that time, I would not even consider doing so. You cannot buy a life, and the life I now live seems nothing less than new. And being entirely other than that of which I could have conceived on my own, this life is clearly something God has determined for me. I have learned quite well part one of the never-ending lesson that the unexpected things God throws at you can lead to results dramatically greater than your own plans.

And yet, now my life seems to be changing again, in as dramatic a way.
I leave this fall for seminary, something that up until a year or two ago I had only contemplated as something I could not imagine myself doing.
When I complete that degree, Lord Willing, I ought to be fairly well-equipped for ministry.
And what ministry will that be? Only He knows. My own plans to return to Taiwan seem godly and reasonable, but so did my plans to be a prosperous engineer who remained active in my church.

And other changes are occuring as well. The "home" country I returned to isn't looking much like home. Our nation is in an unprecedented situation of becoming something entirely other than what the founders intended. And not through defeat by some foreign power, but by the efforts of our own elected leaders, enabled by a generation of Americans who do not understand or appreciate the freedoms they inherited from those who bled for them.

There are those who question how I could go so far away and live in an entirely foreign culture.
Yet surely it's far easier to encounter a different culture far away, where it is expected, and not at your doorstep? I want to ask them instead, how can you passively watch your own country become something foreign? Foreign lands are exactly that, and can be enjoyed as such. Even when they become home, as Taiwan surely to a large extent has, a place that I love and am comfortable in, I do not expect from it the same things that I expect from the nation of my birth.
I have been able to go forth easily, knowing that America lies safely behind.
What if the country I return to as "home" becomes changed to the point of unrecognizability?
I say "what if", but this is already occurring.

And still other changes. Certain elements that have long been absent in my life have now flickered in and out of it. I find the continuum in which I have lived does not possess the inertia I thought it did. Soon instead of simply continuing in it, it will be my own energy and will which sustains it. What had simply been the way things were is now becoming something I must actively choose to maintain. Certainly, it can be so, but do I want that? Does God want that?

I am not an optimist. Things will happen in my life either because God allows me to cause them, either by action or inaction, or because God intervened and caused them in spite of my efforts.
Nothing happens in life for any other reason. Hoping very much that it will be better than it is likely to be may be a helpful way for some people to maintain good spirits, but it certainly seems like an invitation to disappointment to me. If I have reason to hope, it is because God has blessed me beyond anything I could imagine, not because "life is good". Life is not good, life is Christ, and to die is gain. Yet my prayer is that God keeps me alive for as long as He has a purpose for me.
My life is forfeit to Him who ransomed it, and He teaches me increasingly how much this is true.

"So that it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me."

Why can't Christians see that? Why are they hell-bent (wording intentional) on pursuing their own lives in their own way? Why do they see it as their time, or at best a power-sharing agreement, not God's time, which He created and loans to us? Yet I am the same. Every day, every day, I begrudge God what is rightfully His.
And somehow on those times when I come before Him, so much less often than He has infinite right to claim, He meets me there and blesses me. How can it be so?

The only explanation is love. As unfathomable as it may seen, God loves what is surely unlovable but for that fact. We say that we love God because God loves us, but it must also be true that we can only be loved by anyone because God loves us.

That is my only hope, as my life changes and I begin to dance to stay upright as the earth shifts beneath me, and my deepest hopes for my life become unsure, even irrelevant.
Somehow God actually loves me, I who surely know how unloveable a person I am.
There is literally no way I can conceive of repaying that love. Even a life of total, perfect service is only the honor due Him. It does not even begin to repay a debt that we are no more capable of paying than of creating ourselves.

All is Gift.

-Joseph

A Moment in Time

Well, I had all but abandoned this, but evidently people do still stumble across it, so I guess it doesn't hurt to update it now and then.

It has been a long time since I wrote a personal article, my writings have mostly been increasingly on my political blog. But indeed, much has happened since I last wrote in here. It's been almost exactly a year now, at that time I was in Taiwan, roughly 4 months in, I guess.

The following 8 months were amazing, but that story has been told, in both words and pictures, elsewhere. Suffice to say, it was a life-changing experience, and Taiwan become more like home to me than I could have imagined. My heart is still there, and there are weeks when I miss it every day. My friends, the ministry, English classes, my own Chinese classes, summer camp, (food!), the city, the mountains, the way the sky looked, even just the working out of day to day life there, all of those things resonate so strongly in my mind that occasionally it's as if I expect to open my eyes and see not north Alabama but a Taipei city street.

And yet I am not there, but here. And if I am ever to live there again, it will be through moving forward, not looking back. Seminary lies across my path, as well it should, and I am excited about that prospect. And it will be so much more meaningful learning lessons when I can look ahead and see how they will help me on the field. The thought of taking the Bible directly from Greek and Hebrew to Chinese without having to go through English is an exhilarating one.

I was told by someone on the field, if I'm not careful, travel could become a life-long occupation.
Evidently the fact that I had a money drawer in my Taipei apartment containing small reserves of currency from the surrounding countries was a sign that I was already a hopeless case.

Another sign might be that when I walk into an international airport, I nearly get tingly with the possibilities stretching out before me. Sure, I could continue to my intended destination. But where else could I go? Almost anywhere. Europe beckons tantalizingly, with its staggering cultural diversity, beautiful locales, and the history of western civilization, just for starters. East Asia is a more familiar target, yet still a largely unknown one. The islands of Japan wonder why I have not yet managed to find them, and Korea lies beyond. All of Africa is still for me, as for ancient explorers, the dark continent, and other than a brief foray in Mexico City, Latin America and everything South of the Border waits impatiently.

Steppe, Desert, Rainforest, Tundra... the staggering scope, complexity and beauty still remaining in a long-fallen world indeed leaves man "without excuse". I sometimes think that these Atheists who so boldly, arrogantly and foolishly declare that they have theorized God into nonexistence can never have really stopped and simply watched a sunrise or sunset; I can never witness one without being reminded of the majesty that established a natural world in which this kind of beauty is integral. The delicately balanced function that places our earth among the stars in just such a way to sustain life has also matchless form, form that reflects the Glory of Him who established it.

All this world to see, and yet... if I was presented with a ticket to anywhere, and enough money to stay there a while, I am not sure that I wouldn't go to a place that has stayed with me since the one time I have been there. One day, to celebrate the birthday of a wonderfully interesting lady from South Africa who had a unique ministry in Taipei city, we took a train down the mountainous Taiwanese east coast. There the forested mountains fall away in sea cliffs to the Pacific, leaving in some places only perilous ledges for transportation. The train winds along the coast away from the Taipei metropolis, out through little seaside villages. Finally we arrived at a particularly small one, disembarked into the tiny station, and struck out for the beach.
This is not a Florida beach, by any means. Few beaches in Taiwan, except at the southernmost tip, can boast perfect white sand, or smooth spotless banks. They tend to be brown and cluttered, sometimes polluted.

But this beach is a little different. Some clutter is there until you get closer to the water's edge, including an oddly high number of dead pufferfish laying about, but the sand is soft and black.
The black sand doesn't obscure the water like light sand does, and you can see straight to the bottom. Unlike the sheer mountainsides directly across the traintracks from us, the sand's slope is gradual, and we waded a good ways out. The day had been bright and hot earlier, followed by a rainstorm, but now the sky was overcast, and the tops of the green mountains were shrouded in mist. These days you can usually find at least a few students at any prominent beach, often hundreds of them. Other beaches are more locally known, and have a smaller, more dedicated attendance. Today was no exception, though the cloudy weather had reduced turn-out. There were even a few optimistic college students in wetsuits, trying to ride the small waves on their surf boards. Foreigners seemed to be in low attendance, however. I can recall that there might have been one other foreigner there, otherwise it was just us.
We then floated in the calm sea of that evening, listening to the waves and watching the mist move around the mountain tops that towered above us. If you offered me the chance, I can't promise that's not the first place I'd go.

Later we retired underneath a nearby large concrete military shore emplacement, long since abandoned and covered in Chinese graffiti, and used wooden debris that had collected inside to build a fire. (One guy, who had grown up in a village in Indonesia where his parents were missionaries, used a section of bamboo as a bellows to get the fire going) We boiled some water to make tea, and ate some of the snacks we had brought. A little bread truck playing music pulled up on the small lane behind the bunker, and we bought some sandwiches from it. The evening passed slowly and enjoyably. Finally, as I had to be at church in the morning, I and another guy in a similar situation took our leave, as rain began to pour. We hiked back to the train station, getting soaked in the process, and using our limited Chinese to explain to a couple who had taken refuge from the deluge in a small shrine that we did not, unfortunately, know of any place nearby where umbrellas could be purchased.

Upon reaching the station, we waited for the train a good bit. I was exhausted after a very long day, all that I am telling here was just the latter portion of it. This was the second beach we had been to, the previous one was more well-known, with golden sand. We made a trip up to the 7-11 to buy various things (cold noodles, dried fruit, cookies) which we combined into a decent lunch.
We also explored the nearby town, finding some interesting shops. But perhaps all that can be told another time. Coming back to this portion of the story, eventually the train did arrive, and we boarded. My sandals had caused some serious damage to my feet at this point, but I was too satisfied to care much. We did not, however, go back the entire way by train as we had come.
Instead, we went down the line a couple more stops, getting off at a somewhat more prominent town that had a bus line that ran back to Taipei. Though this was the first time for both of us, we successfully located the bus station, and before long were resting on the bus, on our way back to Taipei.

That was a good day, one that I will remember for a long time.
Will I ever get back there? He knows, and I trust Him.
My plans would never have led me to that place, or the many others I came to know and love.
It is only as a result of His plan for me that I forsook my career and ventured out, and now I cannot conceive of my life without the experiences that followed.
How then can I fail to believe that His ways are superior to mine?
I cannot. And so I press forward.

-Joseph

As it now stands

From time to time, I recall that I have a blog.
At such times I am occasionally compelled to post in it, but normally let the fit pass.

This is not one of those times, as it's too early to sleep but too late to do anything terribly productive. (not really, but I'll get around to that after the blog, hopefully)

For the reader who may stumble upon this (probably in its incarnation on facebook as a note),
I should probably mention what things have been like lately.

In general, things have been going well. My Chinese continues to advance slowly but surely, though I am not taking classes next month due to time and money constraints. I will undoubtedly have some mornings free during which I could continue to take them, but I've already taken a month or two more than originally planned, and the issue is more that as I become increasingly involved in ministry here, I never know when I will need to have the time free for other purposes.
(I will miss my teachers, but I'm also certainly not ruling out resuming classes later if I determine that I will have enough time.)

The work here goes slowly. Frustratingly slowly, at times. In a prosperous and technologically advanced nation, its easy to forget that despite a long missions presence here, Taiwan is in some way still pretty much the front lines. There's a long history of evangelical work here, but little penetration.

Opportunities for direct evangelism are there, but are harder because of the language barrier, a pretty consistent post-modernism (Oh, you came all the way here for your faith? That's great, it's good to see that kind of dedication in a young person... etc), and the fact that most people here just don't see a need for it.

Either they're not religiously inclined (mostly younger people), or they are already following Daoism or Buddhism or the sort of amalgamated version you often get here. Taiwanese are polytheistic pragmatists; if there is a god out there that they know about, they'll add them in for luck. I've seen icons of Jesus in a temple here, and I'm told there is a shrine to the Unknown God in another city not too far from here.

So everywhere you see things like mirrors over doorways, family idol shelves, food set out with incense in front of businesses on auspicious lunar days, etc.

Compared to that sort of vague, all-inclusive mysticism, the gospel stands out in stark contrast.
Many people here are potentially willing to add Jesus to their personal pantheon, but forsaking all other gods, and to a large extent the culture that goes with them, in addition to insulting your ancestors (and by extension, your living ones too), is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?
(ref. John 6)

The answer, it seems, is that few in Taiwan can right now. Part of the problem is that the Christian community as such is still developing. In some places, churches are relatively isolated, a small band of believers meeting on Sundays. The impact on the community is not always noticeable, and outreach can be difficult for various reasons. Door to door evangelism, for example, is not suited to the culture, where a personal relationship context is generally necessary before someone will consider really letting what you say sink in (they will usually listen to be polite, or even agree with you, but 'yes' is often considered a polite and non-offensive way of saying 'no' here), but would be difficult anyway because people do not live in convenient rows of houses with accessible front doors here, but in (usually gated) apartments. There has never been a church culture here, so there is no sense that going to church on Sunday is a moral activity. "Getting my religion in" here takes the form of going down to the local temple and lighting some joss (incense) sticks, or burning fake paper money in a little pot in front of your business.

To sum it up, except in rare circumstances, no normal activity would lead to someone going to church here, if there is even a church near them.

And people don't always exactly rush to decisions. I have heard that the average Taiwanese Christian heard the gospel 11 times before they accepted it. I also know at least two Christians here who, once they started going to church, did so for 8 years before they accepted Christ.

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. In this prosperous, modernized, and traditionally polytheistic culture, the gospel has made slow progress. Please pray that God will awaken the spirit of the Taiwanese people and cause them to feel a need for Him in their lives.

There are great opportunities here, especially among students, but not enough people who can and are willing to pursue them. The number of missionaries here is also decreasing due to attrition (retirement, transfers, etc) Please pray that God will raise up people with a strong desire to make His name more greatly glorified in this place.

-Joseph

It's about time....

So, I am in Taiwan.

I have updated this so infrequently that I suspect no one will read it in anything like a timely fashion, so instead of giving an update I will simply ramble.

Being a missionary here is different than one might expect. The language barrier is something, certainly, and there are times when I eat strange food that I'm not crazy about, but for the most part the hardships are familiar, trivial ones, magnified by the lack of familiar, trivial comforts.

I love Chinese food, I am picking up a little Chinese (a very little, but any is more than I knew before!), my apartment is quite comfortable, and I am very much enjoying being overseas. So much for the conventional hardships of foreign missions...

No, the difficulties are things like missing my church on Sunday and feeling as if my spiritual life is suffering for the lack of it (so much for missions being a permanent spiritual high, eh?); being in a culture where hugs are definitely not given at farewells (it sounds silly but you really do start to miss it); wondering if the work that I'm doing will have any eternal significance because much of it does not seem particularly evangelical (I'm aware that this is an easy fallacy to fall into, but knowing that does not always stop me), etc.

I have delved deep into my relationship with God and found that there is not nearly so much there as there should be at this point in my life. I find myself assailed with doubts when I should be faithful, hesitant when I should be bold, incompetent when I should be capable. I am not sufficient for this task, and this humbles and shames me. I pray to God for strength, and instead receive hard-won lessons.

In short, missions is not something you bring to other people. It's something God does to you.

He is certainly changing me. But the more I change, the farther I see I must change. In the curve which must approach sanctification, I feel I am asymptotically veering farther away.
Eventually, it will come around. It must, because He has said it will be so. But in the mean time I feel very far from where I should be.

I ask myself, how can I share God with others when I have pursued Him so little myself?
How will He overflow from my life to that of others when I feel like a virtual black hole of His forgiveness and mercy, constantly needing greater quantities of it?

I believe He will, and maybe is even now.
One thing I may be sure of, all glory is His.
In my endless quest to justify everything about myself, I find that I utterly cannot.
I cannot justify myself, my actions, my thoughts, my relations with others, nothing.
I can only fall on His grace and pray that it will be sufficient for even one such as me.

-Joseph